Emotions in Sudan can be incredibly intense. The living conditions are basic, the land is harsh, and the days are packed. It can be hard to process everything as it happens, and even harder to anticipate how you will react to various situations. However, I expected that since I had already traveled into Sudan twice, I was pretty prepared for how I would feel. That is why I was completely caught off-guard when we walked through ward after ward at the Medecins Sans Frontieres and I felt myself caught up in a torrent of emotions. I had to fight back tears and struggle to pay attention to the midwife giving us the tour. I did not expect to feel that way since I toured MSF last year and spent a great deal of time working in the In Deed and Truth clinic in Tonj. Why was I all of the sudden unable to process what was in front of my face?

The midwife was telling us that malnutrition cases were way up due to the drought throughout the region and the lack of crops. We saw the evidence as we walked through the feeding areas and saw rail-thin children receiving nourishment. It was too much. I felt my heart break a little each time we rounded the corner to find reed-like humans spilling out of the treatment areas and into makeshift overflow areas. Why is there never a solution? Why, in a land that has struggled and suffered so much over the last half century, are the people still suffering? All I could do was choke back the tears and keep walking, promising myself to never forget that feeling and to never lose touch with humanity and compassion.

Snapshot of Wednesday:
-Spent time with the ladies on our compound, and took a lot of pictures of the kiddos…they are no stranger to my camera!
-Met with the Bible School students to discuss the program for the week of final exams and the radio program
-Walked into town to meet with the commissioner…he was busy until 3:00, so we walked around Nasir town.
-Visited MSF and toured their facilities.
-Took more pictures of the beautiful Nuer children of Nasir on our walk.
-Met with the commissioner and arranged a car and a boat to get us to the various outlying villages we were scheduled to visit.
-Returned to the compound, where we just relaxed for a bit.
-Nancy, Blaise, and I walked to the nearby borehole to hang out with the people fetching water, hold some children, and take more pictures.

Sora time (prepare yourself, there are MANY)!

In the morning, I went to hang out with the women on our compound…because I love them! They taught me a new word/phrase: E jin nyimaar…you are my sister.  I cannot tell you the honor that I felt for being called a sister of Nyaret, Martha, and Nyabol…they are amazing women, and though our geographic locations and skin colors are so incredibly different, we are truly sisters in Christ!

Martha, Nyapal, and I…

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Nyimar (my sister), Nyaret…

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Cop (pronounced cope), or sorghum…

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In the Bible School, Buay does some drumming as the students sing a beautful hymn in Nuer…

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Kerry explains the hand-held radios to the students…

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A light rain had fallen early that morning, leaving the black cotton soil just as tacky as I remembered it (this is why barefoot is easier after a rain in Nasir)…

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On our walk into town, I captured the following shots…

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The commissioner, Duk Tap, was not in, so we decided to just walk around the market and visit MSF (Doctors Without Borders) while we waited…

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After a great meeting with the commissioner, we headed back to our compound, where everyone chilled for a bit.  Nancy, Blaise, and I took that opportunity to head over to the nearest borehole and hang with the women and kiddos…

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The kids were VERY interested in how hairy Blaise is!
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Highs:

-My incredible reunion with Mary, from the Bible School.  When we were touring MSF, we entered a patient ward and there she was.  We immediately recognized each other, and right there in front of everyone, we started the whole greeting process, which lasted no less than 3 minutes:

*Hand shakes*, maale, maale, maale migua, maale migua, *hugs*, maale mideet, maale mideet, *hugs*, maale michum chum, maale michum chum, *hugs*….on and on.  

-How incredibly awesome our team was and how involved everyone was with every aspect of the Bible School and engaging the community
Lows:
-The intensity of sadness I felt at the MSF clinic…there is a palpable difference between a Christ-centered clinic (In Deed and Truth in Tonj) and a secular organization which does not offer the same hope of salvation
-Though this was humorous, it wasn’t a highlight of the day! That night, I gathered up my little Ziploc bags of shower stuff, my towel, and my headlamp and traipsed out to the shower stall that still stood behind our huts. I walked in and as I prepared to put my stuff down, my headlamp illuminated a MASSIVE brown spider on the wall. Like any sane human being, I screeched at the top of my lungs and shot out of that stall in a split second. A screaming khawaja attracts a lot of attention, so it wasn’t but another couple of seconds that Kim, Goi, and Blaise showed up on the scene to find out what was going on. All of them laughed at me, and they went in after the spider. I stood outside and shouted in that that spider needed to be DEAD before I was going back in. I heard a lot of pounding, Kim and Blaise both laughing, and then Kim say, “Cassan-d-ra, spider is dead.” I was still skeptical, but I poked my head in and carefully scanned the stall with my torch. Sure enough, the spider was squashed and it was again safe for me to enter. That was the most uneasy bath I have ever taken, as I was on high alert and scanning the stall the whole time.
From then on, I took my baths in the middle of the afternoon. No kidding.
God Showed Me:
-The stark contrast between the Light and the Darkness in the form of His hope.  I visited MSF last year, but in light of IDAT’s work in Tonj, MSF seemed so much more hopeless this year.  At first I couldn’t quite pinpoint it, but I finally realized that the fact that the workers aren’t offering the Gospel or praying over the patients as they seek treatment made the place seem so dreary and sad.  

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