Do you actively disciple your kids and lead them toward Jesus each day? Or in a vacuum of Truth, is the world leading them astray?
It’s a tough assessment to make about yourself and how well you’re doing at discipleship. But it’s so, so necessary. Because you already know that the Gospel is the most important thing you can teach them, it’s just that maybe you’re pretty overwhelmed about how to do it, exactly.
Today’s post is Part Two in a series about teaching your children the Gospel & leading them to Christ. (See the first post here!) Last time, I shared why it’s so important to teach your kids the Gospel, and today I am going to talk about how to disciple them.
This isn’t a step-by-step, here’s-what-to-say kind of post, though. It’s more of a larger framework for cultivating a home and family life that is Gospel-centered. One that not only actively teaches them the Word of God, but also shows them grace and demonstrates His love and faithfulness each day.
HOW TO DISCIPLE YOUR KIDS: 7 WAYS TO LEAD THEM TO JESUS
Begin with Prayer
And pray like lives depend on it. Because they do. You know you cannot save your kids. Homeschooling cannot save your kids. Going to church every Sunday cannot save your kids. Only God can do that.
So always begin with prayer.
Pray that God would give your kids saving faith, that they would grow into committed followers of Jesus who are not just hearers, but doers of the Word. And pray that He would lead you each day in your actions, your conversations, your free time, and your work time. Pray that you would be sensitive to the leading of the Holy Spirit, and then when He moves you, you’d follow.
Prayer is often the last thing we do – our last-ditch effort when we’ve done all the other things within our own power. We throw our hands up and say, “Well, there’s nothing left to do but pray.”
You guys, that’s the best thing we can do! And it’s THE MOST important thing you can do in order to disciple your kids (or anyone else, for that matter) to Jesus.
Pray for them, pray over them, & pray with them.
Only God can soften hearts and only He can save them. If your children haven’t yet committed to following the Lord, then pray for their salvation each and every day. Pray for their hearts to be softened, for the seeds of Truth to fall on fertile soil, and for the Holy Spirit to lead them to Himself.
Let them see you praying for others and involve them in your prayer life. Show them what it means to pray. Keep a running list of people you’re praying for, and don’t forget to praise the Lord together when those prayers have been answered. Help them to see that prayer can move mountains.
Read the Bible to Your Kids
I would consider this to be the second most important thing you can do to disciple your kids. They need to know the Word. They need it written on their hearts. They need to sit in and soak up the Truth only found on those pages, so that they can eventually learn to filter every last thing that happens through that lens.
Your kids will never be able to discern the truth from lies if they don’t know the Truth to begin with.
When they’re really little, read a great storybook bible. Even if they won’t sit still long enough to hear the whole thing, you’re still planting seeds, Mama. As they get a little older (around 4 or 5), transition to reading the whole, grown-up Bible from beginning to end to them.
My preference is to read from both the Old Testament and the New Testament simultaneously (either a short bit from each daily OR alternate days). It not only helps you get through the whole Bible faster, but reading the whole Bible gives them the overarching meta-narrative of Scripture.
And do family bible studies together each day. We love Not Consumed Ministry’s family bible studies, because they are rich with truth and have workbooks for kids ages 4 and up. It’s such a great way to get your whole family gathered around God’s Word each day. We are currently going through the Power of Words study, and it’s been a powerful study for each of us.
The more often they hear the Truth from the pages of Scripture, the more they will internalize it.
Study the Bible for Yourself
Mama, you cannot teach your kids what you don’t know.
You have to be in the Word each and every day, soaking in the Truth for yourself. Once you establish a habit of daily Bible reading, you’ll realize that it’s like oxygen to you: you simply cannot live without hearing God’s voice throughout the pages of Scripture.
For 2021, I’m following a chronological reading plan that will take me through the entire Bible this year. In addition to my own quiet time, Blaise and I are studying Romans together each Saturday morning. And our small group has been studying Amos together each week.
It’s been a while since I’ve been this immersed in God’s Word, but it has felt like rain in the desert to my parched soul.
Make it a priority.
Get up earlier than your kids if at all possible, or turn on the tv during the day. Or perhaps establish a daily quiet time for everyone each afternoon. Even lock yourself in your bedroom when your husband gets home.
Whatever you have to do, make sure that you prioritize your own time in the Word. Not only does it fill your cup to overflowing, but it also sets a good example for them. They will see you pouring over the Scriptures and they’ll see how it changes you (and it will).
Tell Them the Gospel Every Single Day
A few years ago at our church’s women’s conference, one of the speakers talked about how important it is for us as believers to tell ourselves the Gospel each day. The Good News isn’t just for the non-believers; it’s for everyone, yourself and your kids included.
For me, spending some time reflecting on the Gospel each day helps me remember what Jesus has done for me. It humbles me and keeps me in a spiritual posture of gratitude. How can I do anything but praise the Lord for His amazing grace? And how could I not tell others that same Good News??
But even if you’ve shared the Gospel with your kids enough times they can repeat it back to you, keep on telling them. Find opportunities every single day to point them back to Jesus.
And there will be plenty of opportunities. When your kids sin, when you sin, when you read a book, when you study nature, when your lying down or walking or eating or singing.
Tell them the Gospel.
Become Students of Theology Together
You’re praying together and you’re studying Scripture. But don’t forget to become theologians, too. Your kids are going to need to not only know what you believe, but why.
What are the core Christian doctrines? And why do we believe them? Who is God? Who does He say we are? Who is Jesus? What is the significance of the empty tomb? And why do we take Communion? What do we believe about suffering? About salvation? About death and eternal life?
Understanding the foundations of our faith, who God is, and what He has to say about different topics will help you and your kiddos engage with our culture in a loving, but biblically truthful way.
I’ll be sharing our favorite theological resources in the next post of this series, but I want to encourage you that even if the words “doctrine” and “theology” intimidate you (as they once did me), it’s not too late to become a theologian and teach your kids how to be, as well.
It’s never too late.
Ask for Their Forgiveness & Give Them Grace
This one is such a big one in modeling what it means to show humility, to nurture your relationships, and to lead your children to Jesus. When you blow it – you wrong your kids – be sure to humble yourself, look them in the eyes, and ask for their forgiveness.
Kids can smell hypocrisy a mile away, and if they see you preaching one thing, but consistently behaving another, they’ll never take your gospel seriously.
Instead, show them that you’re human, that you sin and fall short of the glory of God, and that you, too, need forgiveness. Use those moments when you make a mistake as opportunities to share the Gospel with them and explain why you need a Savior as much as anyone else.
Your kids will see your shortcomings, but help them also see that God redeems even our weaknesses for His glory. Help them see that failure is not the end. And especially show them what it means to humbly apologize and seek forgiveness when you’re wrong.
I promise you, this one is very powerful way to disciple your kids.
And on the other side of the same coin: give them grace when they make mistakes.
We’re all learning as we go, and once we’ve placed our faith in Christ, we’re still being sanctified each day. It’s a lifelong process, which means we won’t reach perfection on this side of Heaven.
Don’t hold your kids to a higher standard than you want to be held to.
They’re going to make mistakes, sin in a myriad of ways, and hurt others. It takes discernment to know when to discipline and when to extend grace, but it’s important that they’re on the receiving end of grace and mercy often enough that they get how significant it is.
When you do that for them, it’s just a small picture of how our Heavenly Father has been so merciful and gracious toward us.
Prepare Them to Go Out as Sheep Among Wolves
The older I get and the older my kids get, the more aware I am of the dangers of this world. And not just the physical dangers, but the spiritual ones, too. When I think about the years ahead of my kids, I see the minefields they’re going to have to navigate and it honestly scares me to death. I have to step back and remember that God is in control and I am not.
But that doesn’t mean I cannot prepare them.
We want to make sure that our kids are firmly rooted in the Truth of the Gospel. We also want to make sure they understand the many schemes of the enemy so they’re not caught off guard. It means having age-appropriate conversations about the types of sin and evil out there, as well as the temptations they’ll face. It means helping them flesh out truth from lies.
It’s a big task, especially in a culture that’s becoming increasingly hostile to the core doctrines of orthodox Christianity. However, God has given us the Holy Spirit and the Scriptures, which is everything we need to disciple our kids to be fully-devoted followers of Christ.
DON’T WAIT TO DISCIPLE YOUR KIDS UNTIL YOU HAVE IT ALL FIGURED OUT
My best piece of advice to you is to begin discipleship immediately and imperfectly. Don’t wait to begin discipling them until you feel like you have it all figured out, or you have a plan of action. You’ll probably never feel ready or well-equipped enough.
But you are.
Remember that discipleship is really just doing life together and leading them – day by day – closer to Jesus. It is not a program or a curriculum. It does take intentionality, but it doesn’t take a degree. It just takes your willingness to following Jesus and show your kids how to do the same.
IN CONCLUSION
There are loads of resources to help us with family discipleship, and in my next post I’ll be sharing some of our favorites with you.
Our kids are 6 and under, so I haven’t thoroughly searched for what’s out there for tweens and teens, but I can get you started in the younger years. And I’ll give you a great book list for your own study and growth.
I’m excited! And I’d love to pray for you, so if you drop me a comment I’ll be sure to add you to my prayer list.
And please share this post with other mamas you think could be encouraged by it!
Other Post in This Series:
Why The Gospel is the Most Important Thing You Can Teach Your Children
