Crazy. Nutty. Completely out of my mind.
These are thoughts that cross my mind each day that I wake up and I’m in Uganda. No, I didn’t dream it. Yes, I am really here in East Africa for the summer.
Crazy and nutty also describe Kampala itself. It’s chaotic, busy, dirty, smelly, and crowded. It also has a pulse that I have never experienced in America. It’s alive and very raw, and though I have not quite yet discovered its rhythm, I think that it’s always surprising and always entertaining.
Here are some perfect stories to help you understand life here…
Kerrie and I were driving from our home (Livingstons’ house on Tank Hill) to church on Sunday. We came to a very large intersection with a traffic light, which few people actually pay attention to. There were people peddling their wares up and down the street, hoping that a waiting driver will take interest and buy something. They stop at your car window and offer items until you firmly tell them no. So, we are just waiting in traffic and this man walks by carrying a mosquito racket (a bug zapper that looks exactly like a tennis racket), which Kerrie had been wanting to purchase. When the man stops at our car, the following dialogue ensues:
Kerrie: How much for the bug zapper?
Man: 20,000 [shillings]. (about $10 USD)
Kerrie: (in utter shock) WHAT?!? NO, I’m not paying that!
Man: How much you give?
Kerrie: 8,000.
Man: (in utter shock) NO, I cannot. I give you for 20,000.
Kerrie: NO, I don’t want it.
Man: (Shoving the zapper into our car and onto the dash) Okay, I give you for 10,000.
Kerrie: (Shoving the zapper back out of the car) No, I don’t want it. No.
Man: (Still pushing it into the car) You take for 10,000!
Kerrie: (Light turning green) No, huh uh, I don’t want it.
Me: (Trying not to die from laughter as we pull away) Did that really JUST happen?!?
Last Wednesday, Kerrie and I were once again braving the traffic as we headed to another part of town to eat dinner with our Bible study group. We left the house at rush hour, so what is normally terrible traffic was absolutely horrendous. We got to an intersection where a long line of cars were just sitting off to the left, as if they were parked (they were parked), so Kerrie goes around the line of cars and gets up to the stop sign. Suddenly, two traffic cops are on us like white on rice, one is telling us that we need to go down the street and make a U-turn, while the other is shouting that we need to reverse and wait in line. WHAT?!? The boda bodas are streaming by us, oblivious to a line of cars, so why should we have to wait? Kerrie decides that she is not reversing, because that’s insane, so she pulls on out and turns left (though we wanted to go right). We turn onto another street and turn around (the U-turn the first cop suggested), then we come to an intersection where we are waiting. The lines of traffic in both directions are endless, but Kerrie is being patient, waiting for a break so that she can dart out there. Suddenly, the traffic cop yells, “JOIN!!!!” So Kerrie mashes on the gas and we dart into traffic! Since when do you get yelled at for being PATIENT!!??!!
TIA.
The only times that something interesting doesn’t happen is when we don’t leave the house, but even then it seems to find us. I have joked that when I go back home I will seem crazy to everyone else, because I’ll still be in Africa Mode. For example, no one here believes in single-file lines. Nope. At the market, in traffic, pretty much anywhere you go people tend to just group together en masse rather than wait nicely in a line. And they cut in line. Even at the deli counter.
Don’t be surprised if when I return home, I still spread my arms and legs out when I’m standing in line at Kroger…you know, so no one cuts in front of me!
